Jealous or just envious

31 May

I really love that some people aka adults have good to great relationships with their mothers.  Yes they can drive us crazy and make us angry at times.  

As most of you know my relationship is less than perfect or even tolerable.  To give you an example.  I called her yesterday to see if she would like to see her granddaughter before we went on vacation.  She said that would be fine.  Then she goes off on a tangent about how I never answer the phone.  Yes there are times when I do not answer the phone like I am in the bathroom (sometimes no one should be allowed to hear some of what goes on in there), driving, cooking, or asleep.  Then she asks how she is supposed to get in touch with me in case something happens.  I told her that if it was an emergency hopefully she would call 911 first before she even called me.  Then she says well they probably wouldnt be able to get in touch with me.  I told her that is why I have voice mail.  She proceeded to be even more insulting from there and I will spare you the details but, suffice it to say that I told her that the conversation was stressing me out and I was going to say before she hung up on me that we needed to talk about something else.  

So that effectively ended that conversation.  I did not take my daughter to see her grandmother because I figured that since she is mad at me and obviously doesnt want to talk to me then she probably doesnt even want to see me.  

I discussed it with my husband and he said that basically my mom is selfish, and self centered. I also told him that no matter what I did or how much money I spent there is no way I can even come close to pleasing her or making her happy.  Whew, what a revelation to have it only took most of my life.  I told him I was not going to apologize for this because I know that 1.  I will NEVER get an apology from her.  and 2.  I do not feel that I did anything wrong with maybe the exception of not answering my phone EVERY TIME my mom calls which is truthfully unrealistic to expect from anyone.  

I really hope that when my daughter is an adult that I do not do goofy, insane, stupid, selfish things like this to her because someone had better sit me down and set me straight or just say I am acting like my mom if you tell me that I will probably stop.   


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